002.

Riley opened the door to his dorm room and flicked on the light. Throwing his skateboard and messenger bag covered in pins to the floor he let out a sigh. He closed the door and leaned against it..letting his thoughts consume him as he slid to the floor, his back never leaving the wooden door. Closing his eyes as he dug out his pack of Camel Light cigarettes from his right jean pocket, he pulled one out of the pack and removed his small blue lighter from the celafane the pack was wrapped in. Putting the cigarette between his lips he struck the lighter and held the flame to the end inhaling deeply as it began to burn. Letting a huge cloud of gray smoke escape his lips he stood up and walked over to his computer chair. Sitting down in the black rolling chair he moved the mouse around to make the sleep screen disapper. Leaving the cigarette hanging from his mouth he clicked the internet explorer short cut on his desktop and when that filled his screen he typed in the website for his livejournal. Logging in and going to the update page he sat there in silence as he thought about what he should actually put in this damn thing. Shrugging and placing his fingers on the keyboard, with the camel burning slowly on his lips, he began to pour out his thoughts onto the page.



I see you finally caught on and found my journal. I figured you lowlifes would sooner or later...but didnt think it would be this soon. If your staring at the damn page like "Who the fuck is this cocky bastard and why the hell is he such an asshole?" then I should probably formaly introduce myself. Not like any of you bastards care who I am anyways. Well the name is Riley Micheal Jacobs. My real friends call me Riles. Im a 17 year old junior at Roxford high. I know I look like im 12 years old you dont have to point that shit out...one because I dont care to hear it and two because its fucking stupid. Ive been attending this school for god knows how long and Im pretty much sick of it. I rarely show up to class and never do school work. I normally pay the geeks in the front of the class to do it. Its the only reason im passing...got to love dorks for being bought for cheap. I play for the soccer and basketball teams. Im not on ther starting postitons but I dont really care to be. Its just something that looks good for college. Oh shocker right people? Little scene Riley wants to go to college. I dont expect to get in Harvard like my sister but hell community college would be fine by me. If im not at practice after school you can most likely catch me at Mission Impossible with my best friends skateboarding and just hanging out. I live to board...its not just a hobbie its my lifestyle so dont try to fucking make fun of it. That would just be more lame then usual on your part. Im sure you've also heard that im in a band. Im the lead singer and song writer for the band At Face Value. Im in it with four other assholes who own my soul. If you havent seen us live yet then not to sound stuck up but your really fucking missing out. Love us or hate us you need to come to at least one of our shows. I cant promise you wont get hurt in the pit though...thats just a chance you take for showing up. When im not doing all of the above you can probably catch me at my work. Shay's Vinel And Things on 10th street. Its just a little run down place that sales old school rock music and new stuff to the scene. We also carry fanbase collectables. So stop by, say hey, and Ill even give you the low down on some really chill shit.


I dont really talk to my family much. I havent since I was little. My mother Lauren Jacobs took an instant disliking in me the second she popped me out. Never really spoke to me much since then. She is always working or just plain out avoiding me. My father Elliot Jacobs on the other hand has been giving me a hard time since I can remember. Everything Ive ever done or said has been wrong and disrespectful. I dont see how he noticed seeing as he is always at that damn law firm he works for. Yeah you heard me...my father is a fucking low life scum sucking lawyer. Its what brings in our cash but then again its all blood money. My sister, the prodigey, Chantell Jacobs is attending Harvard College. She graduated from Roxford two years ago yet her name seems to be plastered to the walls here. She was acadimicly the smartest girl who ever walked these halls and in the sports world she was pretty renowed also. Playing for every single team offered she brought them to victory year after year. So I guess you could say I have a lot to live up to and im doing a fucking sucky ass job at it.

This being my 2nd to last year here I have kind of been slacking off more then usual. I guess its cause school just started back but then again Ive never been one to stick with the whole buckle down thing for classes. I feel as if I have this stinch of summer covering my whole body. As much as I shower and change clothes I just cant get it to rub off. I have also been kind of absent minded lately too. More so then usual which really kills me. I cant get things to work or follow through and its tearing me up inside. The only good thing that seems to be looming ahead is my band has a show on the 4th of September. If you want to RSVP then you need to as soon as possible. They really seem to be selling out sooner now. That rocks my fucking face off and all but its not like we have a real following. It just feels as if you all show up drunk to blow off steam and arent really getting our message we are putting out there. Oh well at least we have some true hard core fans? Im feeling more depressed then usual. Which sucks because I feel as if I have a razor permentaley attached in to my right hand. Its getting harder and harder to cover up the cuts. At least I can always hide them with my sweat bands and hoodie. Cause no one really notices me wearing those. Keith has kind of been showing signs of worry at practice though. I think he has kind of caught onto the fact I disapper to the bathroom to much in between songs and cigarettes. I dont think he really has the balls to call me out though which is always good for my ego. I just dont know what everyone would think if they found out I cut myself. Most of you dont have a clue who the fuck I even am though so I guess I shouldnt worry that much about being found out. My drinking is getting worse too though. I cant seem to even go to class sober now. Which is extremely sad in my opinon. I went from beer to Jack Daniels. Maybe I should get some help but I just really dont know where to turn these days....Im just so alone.


With all that shit said I have to be at work in less then an hour. If you need me...you know where the fuck to find me. If not to damn bad bitches. Call the cell or hit me up on aim sometime. That is if you want a change of the rich stuck up scene. The screen name is Riles Its Urgent and my email is: chokealready@gmail.com. Im out now.
Laters
Riles


Clicking the update button and putting out the Camel in the ashtray Riley rolled his eyes. A sigh full of gray smoke escaped his lips as he rose from the chair. Unzipping his black Aphex Twin hoodie and changing out of his black and white converes into solid black Etines he walked to his door. Grapping his messenger bag and opening the door he turned off the light. He knew going to work now wouldnt help his mood but he thought it might help the fact he was depressed. Shutting the door and locking it he twirled his car keys around his left pointer finger and headed down the hail singing the lyrics to Taking Back Sunday's "A Decade Under The Flunce". Another day another bunce of bullshit was all he could really think as he turned the corner and made his way out of the boys dorm room buliding.